077: #MeToo & Being a Truth Teller with Hazel Katherine Larkin

Hello Couragemakers and welcome to episode 77 of The Couragemakers Podcast!

I want to begin this episode with a trigger warning. In this episode, we discuss childhood sexual abuse and very briefly suicide. The most important thing is for you to take care of you, so if you need to skip this episode, please do.

This week, I had the absolute privilege of interviewing Hazel Katherine Larkin.

Hazel Katherine Larkin is a mother, writer, teacher, activist, actor, and academic. Her daughters are 13 & 15, of mixed Irish and Indian heritage, and inspire her to be the best version of herself. Hazel has written for stage, screen and publication in Ireland, Singapore, Malaysia, and Dubai, and her memoir Gullible Travels was published at the end of 2015. She has designed and delivered workshops for women and children in a variety of disciplines including personal development, language arts, mental wellness and recovery, and sexuality and consent. She has also devised the first series of workshops ever available in Ireland for midwives and birthworkers around the provision of trauma-informed support for women who have survived sexual abuse. Hazel is a survivor of child sexual abuse, and she writes and speaks about this, and has devised a series of lectures for medical students around the long-term effects of child sexual abuse. Her first loves - Story-telling and Theatre – inform the production and performance all her work. Hazel is currently a PhD candidate researching transgenerational trauma, with particular regard to sexual abuse. Hazel also works with an agency for single parents in Ireland, influencing opinion and policy, and is also a founding member of MAM – Mothers Artists Makers

In this episode we really dive into Hazel’s story. Hazel shares the realities and the struggles of being a truthteller, her experiences of recovery and therapy and how she learned there is no overnight magical transformation, but instead there are lots of small magical steps.

Hazel shares how being a truthteller has been imperative in sharing her own experiences of surviving childhood sexual abuse, great wisdom about telling the truth in stages and the importance of empirical truth.

We dive into the nuances of the #MeToo movement: how we have the choice whether we disclose and to who, how it is enough to draw strength from nodding your head with other people coming forward and the importance of believing yourself when it’s hard.

As Hazel says, one of the most isolating things about sexual abuse is feeling like you’re the only one. This episode is a reminder that you are not alone. Hazel shares advice on what to do if you’ve never disclosed or talked about your experiences and want to start dealing with them, fantastic advice on choosing a counsellor/therapist who works for you and some book suggestions which I’ve added at the end of this episode.

Hazel is a true gift to the world and I am so happy this conversation exists in the world. Hazel says in this episode that her job as a human being is to be the most useful human being she can be and this episode is testament to that.

 

About Hazel:

Hazel Katherine Larkin is a mother, writer, teacher, activist, actor, and academic. Her daughters are 13 & 15, of mixed Irish and Indian heritage, and inspire her to be the best version of herself. Hazel has written for stage, screen and publication in Ireland, Singapore, Malaysia, and Dubai, and her memoir Gullible Travels was published at the end of 2015. She has designed and delivered workshops for women and children in a variety of disciplines including personal development, language arts, mental wellness and recovery, and sexuality and consent. She has also devised the first series of workshops ever available in Ireland for midwives and birthworkers around the provision of trauma-informed support for women who have survived sexual abuse. Hazel is a survivor of child sexual abuse, and she writes and speaks about this, and has devised a series of lectures for medical students around the long-term effects of child sexual abuse. Her first loves - Story-telling and Theatre – inform the production and performance all her work. Hazel is currently a PhD candidate researching transgenerational trauma, with particular regard to sexual abuse. Hazel also works with an agency for single parents in Ireland, influencing opinion and policy, and is also a founding member of MAM – Mothers Artists Makers

Blog | Twitter | Memoir

 

Things We Talked About:

Being a truthteller and being honest and authentic at all times How living on hope is like living the smell of bread when you’re starving How it’s enough to draw strength from other people coming forward, nodding your head Empirical truth vs perception

Resources Mentioned:

‘Needlework’ by Deirdre O’Sullivan 'The Body Keeps The Score' by Bessel Van Der Kolk 'A Child Inside: Understanding, healing and freedom following childhood abuse and trauma’ by Sharon Shaw 'Gullible Travels' by Hazel Katherine Larkin #CSAQT Survivor Twitter Chat 8pm Mondays BST National Helplines and Websites

 

About Meg & That Hummingbird Life

I’m Meg and I’m the host of Couragemakers and founder of That Hummingbird Life. I’m an INFJ creative and multipassionate who has a bit of a notebook and post-it note obsession, loves foot-stomping country music and likes her hot chocolate with way too much chocolate.

I started Couragemakers because I wanted to create a platform for passionate and unconventional women to have honest conversations and to share their stories, struggles and dreams. The intention behind this podcast is to inspire and encourage creative and mission-driven women to live a wholehearted life and follow the beat of their drum.

When I’m not recording episodes, writing bullshit-free, very vulnerable and encouraging Sunday emails to fellow couragemakers (join the party here!) or making new friends with the wonderful guests, you can find me working on all manners of magic over at That Hummingbird Life. THL is the online home for unconventional creatives and multipassionates who want to show up unapologetically and intentionally as who they are, and really own, live and share their many stories. It’s made for couragemakers who have so much great shit to give the world and want to leave their mark but have too much self doubt standing in the way!